It’s a change of scenery, a reset and some team bonding.
That was how a Rangers spokesperson described the club’s trip to Loch Lomond in September 2025, where the beleaguered players were filmed by tourists taking a dip in the icy cold waters.
It’s funny, because most of us would consider wild swimming in Loch Lomond to be a punishment – a notion lent further weight by the fact that Rangers, one of the perennial giants of Scottish football, had failed to win any of their five opening games of the season.
So bad was the start that head coach Russell Martin was said to be clinging to his job, so quite how the sanctioned public humiliation in the Loch will help his cause is anybody’s guess. Only time will tell if the waters have restorative powers for morale and team cohesion…
Former Tottenham midfielder Jamie O’Hara was not enamoured with the idea.
Going swimming in a freezing lake? How is that a team-bonding session? That’s pain. Russell Martin’s getting it all wrong. That’s not team-bonding, that’s making it worse.
If you’re organising a team-bonding session four or five games into a season, you’ve got serious problems.
Maybe Martin should have followed in the footsteps of one of his predecessors as Rangers manager, Walter Smith. He would organise a weekly Tuesday soiree to Glasgow’s branch of TGI Fridays, where the players would down cocktails until the early hours… before being driven home on the team bus by the kitman, Jimmy Bell.
Mind you, not all team bonding sessions are as successful as the ones organised by Smith. And, when booze is involved, is likely that problems will soon surface…
Just Popping Out for a Pint (Or Two)
This Peter Beagrie story is amazing 🤣
“While on Everton’s 1991 pre-season tour of Spain, Beagrie went on a boozy night out following a game with Real Sociedad.
In the early hours he flagged down a Spanish motorcyclist who gave him a lift home. Upon arriving at his hotel he… pic.twitter.com/q0eksPSJFJ
— 90s Football (@90sfootball) March 12, 2024
Take a group of twenty and thirty-something males, throw booze and a sense of bonhomie into the mix and then watch on as trouble brews. Many alcohol-fuelled team bonding sessions have gone unreported, of course, and nowadays they rarely seem to happen – there’s always someone with a camera phone in hand waiting to chart your downfall.
But in years gone by, players often had a more free-spirited approach to their team bonding. Best case scenario: the lads felt a tighter bond and a sense of brotherhood after a good laugh and a sing-song. If somebody was photographed with a traffic cone on their head in a state of undress, so be it. But, often, a line would be crossed… leading to big fights and even bigger hangovers.
Alan Shearer
It’s a scenario that has bedevilled even some of the greatest footballers, with former Newcastle United legend Alan Shearer once punching Keith Gillespie unconscious after one particularly rambunctious day (and night) on the sauce.
Steve McMahon
After one bizarre training session in which they ended up boxing against one another, Manchester City’s Steve McMahon took exception to hard punch landed on him by teammate Niall Quinn. So, later that night, he got his revenge by striking Quinn in a bar. The big Irishman chased McMahon into the street, caught up with him before merrily throwing the midfielder through a shop’s glass window.
Just a matter of weeks before the League Cup final in the year 2000, another England international got himself into bother.
Steve McMahon
Leicester City took a team bonding trip to the infamous La Manga resort, where – no doubt having imbibed one too many – Stan Collymore decided to empty the contents of a fire extinguisher in a bar.
“It was like snow at Christmas,” remarked the Foxes’ Gerry Taggert, but the goodwill was lost on the bar owner and Leicester’s players were packed on the next flight home in disgrace.
Peter Beagrie
Once tipped to play for England, Peter Beagrie found himself lost and alone following Everton’s bonding trip to Spain in 1991. Worse for wear, he flagged down a passing motorcyclist and tried to sneak back into the team’s hotel by, erm, driving the motorbike through a plate glass window. Turns out it was the wrong hotel anyway… with Beagrie needing 50 stitches to various wounds.
Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne
Often, team bonding sessions that end in a boozy bust-up can be laughed off. But sometimes, they have a longer lasting impact – Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne was famously dropped from England’s World Cup squad in 1998 after displeasing head coach Glenn Hoddle with his antics during a training camp in Spain. He never played for England again.
Losing Their Way
“We were blindfolded with ear muffs on. They bounced us off walls in total darkness.”
What happened when the SAS “kidnapped” Partick Thistle?https://t.co/6WhoCiLw82
— BBC Sport Scotland (@BBCSportScot) November 30, 2018
SAS ‘Kidnaps’ Partick Thistle
Even when booze isn’t involved, team bonding sessions can end in disaster. TV programmes simulating the training of SAS recruits are all the rage these days, and it was one such show that inspired Partick Thistle boss Gary Caldwell to toughen up his own troops. So, without telling them, he arranged for a unique team bonding session in which they would be ‘kidnapped’ by the British Army’s Parachute Regiment.
Unfortunately, the simulation would prove to be so realistic and unsettling, some of the Partick Thistle players lost the plot. One, Brice Ntambwe, managed to escape and disappeared into the Scottish countryside, while another – Jack Storer – was reduced to tears by the episode. Afterwards, Partick climbed out of the relegation zone in the Scottish Championship… no doubt the players felt a tighter bond after their harrowing ordeal…
QPR’s Competitive Orienteering
Elsewhere in Scotland, albeit more than a decade earlier, QPR embarked on a team bonding session in the Highlands. Madcap manager, Ian Holloway, arranged for his players to take on some competitive orienteering. But two of his quickest stars, Kevin Gallen and Marc Bircham, spotted an opportunity for some hi-jinx.
They got to the first checkpoints before changing the coordinates, which forced their teammates off on a metaphorical wild goose chase. Some – including one player wearing an electronic tag that had a bail-enforced curfew to adhere to – got so lost that they ended up on the edge of a cliff, where they were perilously saved by air rescue officers in a helicopter.
Chelsea’s Kenedy Belittles China
While QPR may have annoyed the local emergency services, at least they didn’t draw the ire of an entire nation. But Kenedy, the former Chelsea full back, did when Chelsea embarked on a bonding session in China back in 2017. He posted a series of videos on his Instagram channel belittling the nation and its people, which did not go down particularly well. Despite Chelsea issuing a grovelling apology, the Blues were told that they were no longer welcome in the country.
